10/14/2016

Life seems like a complicated balancing act these days. Normally I do not have to think too much about how I do the stuff that I do, what I say, where are the lines drawn and how I can keep a healthy balance between different things and different ideas in life. The balance comes rather naturally. But these days everything seems like out of balance, so doing things in a right way requires a lot more conscious decision and consideration and balancing than normally.

The work vs personal time balance is the main thing right now. My obligations and tasks, as their number has grown over the past few months, have started to wear me out. I'm feeling increasingly inadequate when it comes to my work and that's not exactly a good feeling. I get stuck. I get frustrated. And sometimes I even feel like a failure. So I have to be very careful about finding time for relaxing. I haven't done well when it comes to taking days off these past weeks but at least I try. My recent achievements in this area include:

1) A classical music concert with my dad last week. It had been way too long since I last sat in the concert hall, enjoying good quality music. We went to hear Estonian Philharmonic Chamber Choir and it lifted both of our spirits a great deal that evening. EPCC is probably one of the best chamber choirs there are out there right now, the level of their professionalism is absolutely outstanding. I ought to go and listen to them more often.
2) A photo exhibition (the challenge with Dr A. N. is very much on). The exhibition is called The Measure of Humanity. 45 Years of Documentary Photography in South Africa. It went so well with recently read Mandela's autobiography. But the photos were tough ones. They made me rather sad, at moments I was just disgusted. It is not easy to stand and see a photo like this one (I secretly took the picture, don't tell anyone), it's harder still when there are dozens of images like this:
3) A tea date with brother S. I think it was the first time we two went out since he got married - and well, that's more than five years ago! So I really enjoyed chatting with him. We drank a lot of tea that evening. :)

4) Visiting A. and her cat (who is so bright white I need sunglasses when playing with her). I was once again reminded that you can't possibly know what really goes on in someone's life unless you take time to sit and listen properly. The topics we had to discuss that evening were terribly tough - they included depression and suicide (one of her friends committed suicide just a few weeks ago) - but once again, it was all worth it. I thought to myself when I left her place the next morning - I need to see my friends more often. I need to.
Here's A.'s cat.
5) I've picked up the gym again. No pictures though, lol.
6) I finished my 27th book yesterday. I've done well this year.

But on the other hand there is Greek. When I start to feel like I can't get things done or I'm not qualified enough, I only need to go to the Seminary and teach Greek. If there's one thing I know, it's Greek.

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And here's a song dedicated to yesterday's Nobel prize news. It's Katie Melua's version of Bob Dylan's Blowing in the Wind. Gotta love them lyrics!

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